Since March is International Women's Month, let's talk about gender -- not just the female gender, but all genders.
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...which is why you need to resort to name-
calling -- to protect the world from those who
are "masahol pa sa hayop." (From a post in
Facebook)
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The past month saw a phenomenal clash between religious beliefs and the slow but broadening acceptance of the third gender -- the LGBT group -- no thanks to a self-appointed bastion of righteousness and senator-wannabe who is better seen (and heard) inside the boxing ring than out of it.
As with many of my shoutouts in Facebook in the light of that "masahol pa sa hayop" gaffe, I remain steadfast in my belief that religious bigotry has no place in modern society. To accept a gender group's existence but to curtail their right to happiness in relationships is still bigotry in every sense of the word. We cannot sit in our high thrones of morality and throw stones at those who we deem are "sinful in God's eyes," for we are not God, much less, yardsticks of morality. No amount of knowledge in biblical verses can hide the fact that some of us are blind to our own prejudices, or simply refuse to understand the struggles and aspirations of those with a set of beliefs different from ours.
After all, it's much easier to say, "Ah, basta!" than to allow the mind to expand its understanding of the world and the beings sharing it with us. Ah basta, babae at lalaki lang ang alam ko. Ah basta, walang bakla sa mga hayop. Ah basta, hindi pwedeng magsama bilang magkatipan ang dalawang babae or dalawang lalaki. Ah basta...
Ah basta...all of these are merely Man's rules. Have we truly considered if these are also God's rules? Truth be said, we have nary a clue as to the extent of God's acceptance and love for everything He has created. Only we mere mortals are shrewd enough to mold our view of the world according to our puny understanding -- then decorate these with divine undertones to make them sound all big and holy like God's word.
Tsk. The Pharisees are still very much alive up to this day, so it seems. Pharisees -- concocting religious shit to keep "unholy ideas" in check since many centuries B.C.
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The past few years have also seen an even more heightened awareness of gender bias and how to eliminate or at least, mitigate it from all sectors of life.
There are still those who do not recognize gender bias, though -- not because they do not want to but because they are not aware of what it is. Some are even unaware that they are guilty of causing gender bias.
Before the problem is tackled, first, there has to be a definition of terms.
The primary question to be asked here is this: what is the difference between sex and gender?
ReachOut.com provides a good definition of
sex as being "generally assigned to a person at birth, usually based on external and internal reproductive organs (whether you have a penis or vagina), hormones, and the genetic makeup (known as sex chromosomes) inherited from your parents."
Technically, sex is the physiological makeup you get to have as a default.
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Every color, every hue...is represented by me and you. (From
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Gender, meanwhile, presents distinctions that go beyond the physical orientation. It presents whole new dimensions to the bland male/female molds by integrating the mental, emotional, psychological, and even spiritual and cultural aspects of a person's identity. By doing so, a person can now choose to be male, female, both, or neither. So if you're still quite clueless as to why the LGBT pride flags come in the colors of the rainbow, this is why.
Now, if you feel that choosing one's orientation is tantamount to inviting God's wrath, then stop reading this, go back to the Middle Ages, and thump your Bible.
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Now, about women empowerment.
Recently, results on a study conducted by the International Labor Organization (ILO) became a hot topic in many news outlets. It talked about the Philippines ranking fourth among countries in terms of women holding middle- to senior-management positions in private firms over the last two decades.
This could be seen as a victory in the fight for gender equality in the Philippines -- but alas, this victory is watered down in the details. It turns out that while there are more women holding high positions in private companies, majority of these private firms are microenterprises. In other words, rumaraket lang si misis/ate/Ma'am, probably to augment a family income that -- if relied entirely on the man of the house -- will not be enough to keep said family comfortably afloat.
And so, it is not really a fight for gender equality being conquered here but a fight against poverty.
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Up to now, we have yet to truly recognize the value of women in the Filipino family. Traditional views dictate that she is supposed to be the "ilaw ng tahanan," but do not specify exactly how she provides the said "ilaw."
This, however, is the reality in many Filipino households, especially those in the boondocks: women are supposed to be all of these and more -- wife, homemaker, baby generator, cook, laundry person, nanny, free whore, janitor, and now, family income augmentor. All these while many men come home, sit on their rears, and complain how their life in the workplace sucks while sipping beer in front of the television.
We are still a long way from seeing women making a choice for their health's sake in family planning, especially with legislators literally shooting the bill on reproductive health down.
Wiith that in mind, all I can say is this: where religious fanaticism and misconception ends, a genuine move toward reproductive health begins.
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Earlier today, I found this post in my Facebook account about the move toward gender equality becoming tired already. "Women are not supposed to do what the men can do. Women are created to do what the men CANNOT do." Or something like that.
I dunno whether that post was in honor of my femininity or an implicit effort to put me and my fellow womenfolk into place. Funny how that post came out a day after International Women's Day.
Primarily, the only thing women can do that men cannot do is to give birth.
So...does that mean that we should just stick to making babies instead of showing the world what awesomeness we women can come up with?
Or am I just reading between the lines too much?
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Just noticing how many intelligent women I know are either separated from their husbands or are standing firm on their desire to not get married.
You see that's the problem with the female gender. You start thinking big things and making decisions on your own -- then suddenly the men around you scuttle away like frightened rats.
What is it about thinking women that men are so afraid of? I wonder...
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Wokey, before the menfolk admonish me for trash-talking them, allow me to redeem myself with this.
Women empowerment does not only involve women. In fact, this concept cannot become tangible if not for the men who contribute to the cause by acknowledging women's strengths and weaknesses and sharing the load.
That is why I am brought to tears when I see grown men playing Mommy to their children. And when I say playing Mommy, I mean helping out with the household chores, tending to the kids, expertly changing diapers, cooking for the family...and not just sitting on their respective bums after a day at work.
After all, in today's world, it's no longer the father's sole duty to provide the family's upkeep. The mother has already filled that economic gap to make ends meet. So if they can share duties in that aspect, why not in duties at home?
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E.L. James, author of 50 Shdes of Grey. (from
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Men in women empowerment are also aware of the fact that a woman's vagina is not their property but hers and hers alone.
So when a woman says no, she means it. It doesn't matter what the heck she is (or isn't) wearing.
And Anastasia Steele of 50 Shades of Grey fame, it doesn't matter if he is rich and drop-dead gorgeous. The freaking guy is raping you, and you are taking so much pleasure from it?! Seriously, E.L. James...
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And with that, I would like to give my love to all the strong women of the world on this International Month of Women.
To those not yet strong enough...well, remember that only you can change the tide -- not your man, not the people around you, not the Church or any other religious institution around. At the end of the day, it will all boil down to you.
Make that change.